I’m sorry mom

I’m sorry mom for not being there when i was a teenager rebelling. I’m sorry i kept you up at night praying for me to come home. I’m sorry i made you worry about me constantly. I’m sorry I made you stressed. I’m sorry mom for staying out all night and not calling you. I’m sorry mom for saying that i hated you. I’m sorry mom for believing that you hated me too. I’m sorry mom for not being more consoling when they found out you had cancer. I’m sorry mom for not going to your chemo appointments with you. I’m sorry for never holding your hand. I’m sorry for always being “busy”. I’m sorry for not bringing your grandchildren over enough for you to cherish them. I’m sorry for not realizing that when you couldn’t come over, you weren’t lazy, you were worn out. I’m sorry for not believing that you were terminal. I’m sorry for not seeing that you weren’t going to get better. I’m sorry for not believing dad when he told me you were taking your last breaths. I’m sorry for not being there when you did. I’m so sorry for letting you die thinking i did not love you, when i loved you most of all. I’m so sorry.